All you never needed to know (longish post)

[Draco]

Originally posted by charlies angel:
8:12am
Accounting called to say they couldn't access expense reports database. Gave them Standard Sys Admin Answer #112, "Well, it
works for me." Let them rant and rave while I unplugged my coffeemaker from the UPS and plugged their server back in. Suggested they try it again. One more happy customer...

And who says Tech's aren't helpful http://www.p45.net/rant/wink.gif

[charlies angel]

about tech support!

During a recent application deployment, someone in our department received this Help Desk Log. Since we enjoyed this log so much in our department, we decided to create this site and share some of the humor we found with others.
Author : Unknown
Source: Forwarded email
Monday
------
8:05am
User called to say they forgot password. Told them to use password retrieval utility called FDISK. Blissfully ignorant, they thank me and hang up. God, we let the people vote and drive, too?

8:12am
Accounting called to say they couldn't access expense reports database. Gave them Standard Sys Admin Answer #112, "Well, it
works for me." Let them rant and rave while I unplugged my coffeemaker from the UPS and plugged their server back in. Suggested they try it again. One more happy customer...

8:14 am
User from 8:05 call said they received error message "Error accessing Drive 0." Told them it was an OS problem. Transferred them to microsupport.

11:00 am
Relatively quiet for last few hours. Decide to plug support phone back in so I can call my girlfriend. Says parents are coming into
town this weekend. Put her on hold and transferred her to janitorial closet down in basement. What is she thinking? The "Myst" and "Doom" nationals are this weekend!

11:34 am
Another user calls (do they ever learn?). Says they want ACL changed on HR performance review database so that nobody but HR can
access database. Tell them no problem. Hang up. Change ACL. Add @MailSend so performance reviews are sent to */US.

12:00 pm
Lunch

3:30 pm
Return from lunch.

3:55 pm
Wake up from nap. Bad dream makes me cranky. Bounce servers for no reason. Return to napping.

4:23 pm
Yet another user calls. Wants to know how to change fonts on form. Ask them what chip set they're using. Tell them to call back when
they find out.

4:55 pm
Decide to run "Create Save/Replication Conflicts" macro so next shift has something to do.

Thursday
--------
8:00 am
New guy ("Marvin") started today. "Nice plaids", I offer. Show him server room, wiring closet, and technical library. Set him up with IBM PC-XT. Tell him to quit whining, Notes runs the same in both monochrome and color.

8:45 am
New guy's PC finishes booting up. Tell him I'll create new ID for him. Set minimum password length to 64. Go grab smoke.

9:30 am
Introduce Louie the custodian to Marvin. "Nice plaids", Louie comments. Is this guy great or what?!

11:00 am
Beat Louie in dominos game. Louie leaves. Fish spare dominos out of sleeves ("Always have backups"). User calls, says Accounting
server is down. Untie Ethernet cable from radio antenna (better reception) and plug back into hub. Tell user to try again.
Another happy customer!

11:55 am
Brief Marvin on Corporate Policy 98.022.01: "Whereas all new employee beginning on days ending in 'Y' shall enjoy all proper aspects with said corporation, said employee is obligated to provide sustenance and relief to senior technical analyst on shift." Marvin doubts. I point to "Corporate Policy" database (a fine piece of work, if I say so myself!). "Remember, that's DOUBLE pepperoni and NO peppers!" I yell to Marvin as he steps over open
floor tile to get to exit door.

1:00 pm
Oooooh! Pizza makes me so sleepy...

4:30 pm
Wake from refreshing nap. Catch Marvin scanning want ads.

5:00 pm
Shift change. Flick HR's server off and on several times (just testing the On/Off button...). See ya tomorrow.

<FONT SIZE="1" color="#233932" FACE="Arial, Helvetica, Verdana">[This message has been edited by charlies angel (edited 18 October 2000).]</FONT>

[Bigjoe]

busy today I see CA.
http://www.p45.net/rant/smile.gif

[charlies angel]

yes the names were changed to protect the guilty...sorry...innocent.. http://www.p45.net/rant/biggrin.gif http://www.p45.net/rant/biggrin.gif http://www.p45.net/rant/biggrin.gif

[Bramble]

Originally posted by Draco:
And who says Tech's aren't helpful http://www.p45.net/rant/wink.gif

Well I have seen you 'work' very helpful,you sent me here